When the conflict is a fact
A conflict is a part of working life, and can be found both at individual, group and organizational level. According to a survey conducted in Swedish workplaces in 2006 was 33% of Swedes involved in at least one conflict in the workplace, and too many sick leaves could be attributed to conflict (9% of women's total sick leave and 9% of men's long-term sickness).
Although we try to do our best to prevent conflict, still sometimes the conflict is a fact. The most important thing is that you take hold of the problem as soon as it presents itself. Don’t let it drag on, then a small conflict could grow into something even bigger and more difficult to solve. Think of the snowball...
We work with different models and tools that are based on the book by Desirée le Grand "Communication and motivation in meetings and conversations" and her book: "Success and Happiness".
The most important advice I would give you when to resolve a conflict in a professional manner is that you distinguish between cause and person. That's what happened that must be sorted out and the aim must never be to find scapegoats or blame.
Our top 10 to solve a conflict:
1st Use Non Violent Communication
2nd Make sure that all parties involved are called to a meeting where everyone can share how they experience the problem. (Some will not even think it is a "conflict"). Let everyone have their say.
Make it clear why you are gathered.
3rd Bring in a professional! The most common reason for conflicts not being resolved is that you do not have the skills!
4th Within the TA – Transactional Analyse we talk about win-win and this has also become a familiar concept in the business world. It is important that all parties feel that this will be resolved and that all feel the win-win (ie we shall not designate a sinner and a sacrifice). Clarifies that the con-conflicts are resolved when there is a win-win solution and make sure everyone feels like the winner!
5th Make an ethical and moral agreement. "What we're talking about
here today stays in the room. " "We must be honest and respect each other".
6th Establish a clear framework for when, where and how you will meet. Be careful not to "enlarge" a conflict: "We meet as long as necessary". Instead, try to restrict freedom of action in time so that all Focus is on trying to find a win-win solution.
7th Work with clear questions and let the professional summarize each meeting.
8th Take a decision with focus on a solution. Write it down. Let everyone talk and be heard. At the end of the session everyone gets the opportunity to discuss what they experienced as positive factors
9th End the counseling by taking each other’s hands and thank each other for a good cooperation.
10th Provide opportunities for follow – up meetings.